It's been 3 years I have felt any human touch, no kidding, I once jacked for 4 hours to unspeakable shit at night from 3a.m. to 7a.m. in morning, after finishing and seeing what I was watching, how long I have been watching, the time at which I was watching, the post nut clarity was so hard, I just sat for 30-40min sweating and thinking what I am doing with my life, it was so bad that I went outside and touched grass, like literally I touched grass that's how desperate and pathetic I was, still am nothing has improved.