\>Knock on door 

\>GO AWAY IM BUSY" 

\>Door opens, anon's parents take a timid step into the room 

\>Pissjugs fill most of the available floorspace 

\>"Anon, what..What are you doing?" 

\>Camera pans to anon, who sits crosslegged and hunched over a small dusty monitor, fat rolls flowing freely to reveal a completely naked figure except for some ripped, stained Y-fronts. 

\>"I just found a small indie game on Steam  where I can exploit an ingame mechanic to crash the servers \**snortlaugh\*\* shart\** I'm basically a hacker, you know." 

\>A pale, chunky hand reaches into an industrial-sized bag of Flamina Hot Cheetos. Some sounds, akin  to that of a hungry hippopotamus devouring a small mammal, follow. The creature, wipes the crumbs on its pallid body. 

\>"O-okay, anon. We'll leave you to it." 

\>The mother wipes away a single tear as she backs out the room. The father gives a single glare, a mix of regret, shame and stoic acceptance, before following suit and gently closing over the  door. 

\>A single balloon reading "Happy 30th birthday, son hovers for several days in the doorway unnoticed, until the helium leaks out of it and it slumps, almost wearily, to the floor.