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Submitted by cummy on December 10, 2021

Twas the night before Christmas 

And all through the hood

Not a creature was stirring

Not even a blud


When santa came down 

He asked with a sneer

"Yo, ho ho ho 

have them ho hoes been here?"


I noticed his bag, it looked pretty full

So I pulled out my heat, popped a cap in his skull. 


But to my surprise, he didn't go down

He pulled out a glock, and then went to town


When all the dust settled,

I was alive

And there was 'ol nick

Who was dead by my side


I ripped open his sack

And pulled out that junk

It came tumbling down

With a mighty big thunk


Then, to my surprise 

When I took a look

It seemed that old santa

Was quite the mad crook


Inside of that sack

Lay a dozen coke bricks

A million greens

And a dynamite stick


Could he been a narc?

Nah, I said with a grin

There wasn't no wire

Laying 'neath his fat chin


So I scooped up the blow

And I took a nice whiff

Then I picked up my heat

And said "that's a nice gift!"