So you're at a funeral of someone you never talked to, and you decide to pull out your phone. Watching porn during a funeral is an evil, evil thing to do, but after all, you're a Redditor- an inherently evil being. "They'll never suspect a thing!!" you think, cackling in your mind. What you didn't account for was Uncle Bob, watching over your shoulder. His tacky polarized glasses and twisted expression are the last things you see before your complete social downfall. "Hey \[NAME HERE\], you watchin' some good ol' hentai on your special phone there?" Everyone in the area gasps and turns your way. They notice that you're wearing glasses for some reason while looking at your phone. Slowly, person by person, they all realize your true nature. Uncle Bob was completely aware of the effects of this. Bringer of justice and punishment, he has dragged you out from the shadows, and enlightened the world of your sins. But in reality, your fate was sealed a long time ago. Perhaps it was at birth, or maybe when you first installed Reddit. Chances are, though, that your life had ended the moment you decided to make your phone invulnerable to interfering eyes... As the rest of life passes you by, you realize the truth of this world... *Never trust Reddit.*